Dutch People, Too Open-Minded for Me

Those people from the country above did it again. I thought I was open-minded – I support the women’s right to choose, am 100% for rights for transgenders, and love tofu – but next to Dutch politicians, I may be as closed-minded as Beenie Man.

From: http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,25197,25402957-12377,00.html

“Dutch park unveils signs pointing to gay ‘cruiser’ areas A PARK near Amsterdam has unveiled information signs pointing out spots where officials say gay men are known to have sex – so no visitors are taken by surprise. The signs “clearly indicate what is happening in each zone; also those where gay men are known to practice ‘cruising’,” municipal spokeswoman Manon Koffijberg said. Cruising is a slang word used to describe the act of trawling for casual sex. “If you don’t want to be confronted by a vision of that sort, the signs allow you to avoid specific areas,” said Ms Koffijberg. The De Oeverlanden park in Slotervaart, southwest of Amsterdam, is known as a place where homosexuals from all over the Netherlands and elsewhere in Europe go in search of sex partners. Ms Koffijberg said that while having sex in public was against the law, the park has been used for this purpose for so long that it has become “gedoog”, a Dutch word for tolerating unwanted behaviour. The sexual activities of cruisers, she said, kept mostly to the bushes in the park, and the new signs sought to ensure that they stayed there. “There are various groups of users of the park; people with small children who bathe on the beaches, those who walk their dogs, gays cruising and nature lovers,” said Ms Koffijberg. “Things are arranged so that each group can relax in their own area without intruding on each other.” There had been recent complaints of gay bashing in the Slotervaart area, populated by a large group of immigrants of Muslim origin, with reports of robberies and violence against gay men in De Oeverlanden park.”

Ewwwwwww……. Unless you are George Michael, “cruising” in park is gross. This coming from a man who didn’t know what that term meant until his co-worker used it. That park sure sounds like a busy place. Horny gay prowlers, granola-eating guitar-strumming health-conscious (40% of them wearing sandals) indie chicks/dudes, and parents with kids. It’s just like a disneyland. “On the right, there is the Buttlove World, right next to Nature World.”

I’ve been cruised once, in Japan. I was walking down Shibuya, around 10 or so in the evening, after saying bye to a friend. This latino looking men who was standing on the street made a blowing kiss gesture. It was strange. Being cruised at unsuspectingly leave you with a strange emotion. A mixture of disgust, flattery, and curiosity, I would say. As in, you wonder, “is this guy that sex-starved?” Or, “how could he tell I’m gay?” Yes, I am pretty obvious, and I would say 95% of accomplished gays would be able to tell that I am gay. But still. Having a guts to make a move on to some guy walking down the street?

I once was on a train, and this Indian guy placed his hand right next to mine on the train pole, and tried to hit on me. I was grossed out. Yet again, I was curios. There was a slight temptation for me to pretend to be interested, get out of the packed train together with him. He would follow my lead, walking behind with eyes glittering with hope. After taking few strides away from the platform, I would then turn around quickly, and shoot a barrage of questions: “So do you do this often? Do you get on a train and start hitting on guys?” “What is your success rate?” “Do you simply do it in the disgusting train toilet then?” “Are you too ashamed to go to gay bars? Or do you go to them, but your sex drive is off the roof, and you simply can’t contain myself?” “And please don’t tell me that you couldn’t help yourself cuz I’m ‘special.’ Do I look like I’m 13?”

Talking about the Netherlands, open-mindedness, and park, last year, roughly the same time (March 10, 2008), the councillors over there decided that people can have sex in a popular park -provided that it is not in the proximity of the playground and is done in the evening – but banned dog owners to walk their dogs without a leash.

From http://www.orange.co.uk/news/quirkies/default.htm?rm=storyitem&storyId=2761207

Dog owners angry at public sex plan

“Dog owners in Amsterdam are angry after the city legalised public sex in one of the city’s most famous parks. Councillors agreed that heterosexual and gay couples could have sex in the Vondelpark which has ten million visitors a year. But they promised to clampdown on dog owners who let their pets walk in the park without a lead. One dog owner protested: “As long as the park has existed, we’ve been allowed to let our dogs run freely. It’s outrageous that we will be punished from now on but public sex won’t.” A spokesman for the council which runs the southern part of Amsterdam said: “When the dogs are not kept on a leash they pee on whatever they see and they cause a lot of nuisance for other visitors.” Alderman Paul Van Grieken defended the decision to allow public sex in the park from September. “Why should we oppose a rule on something you can’t oppose a rule on. Moreover it isn’t a nuisance for the other visitors and gives a lot of pleasure to a certain group of people,” he said. “There still are rules,” he added. “They must take their garbage with them afterwards and never have intercourse near the playground. The sex must be limited to the evening hours and night.””

I think it is the first time in history, that a park which is popular enough to be listed on wikipedia (it even has a film museum and open air theater!) legally sanctions public sex!

HELL YEAH!

Being a film buff, I think it is cool that film fantatics are given a chance to recreate a scene from the indie-favorite “Wicker Man.” For those that do not know the story, the film is about a devout Christian cop goes to a f-ed up sexually charged island to investigate a missing girl case. In one particular scene, my fave scene of the film, he stumbles across a park where bunch of couples are having sex. In the evening, of course. It would be amazing if local film groups host an event trying to recreate that scene! Oh, of course they will clean up after their mess. Film fans have great manners, don’t you know?